Boundary Conversation Tool

1 · Pick the moment

Seven moments where the right words matter most. Pick one, read the script, say it in your own voice — the exact wording matters less than the meaning arriving intact.

Which moment do you want words for? — Choose a moment — Slowing down Pausing or stopping Saying “this isn't on the table” Leaving early The morning after When pressure is present Changing your mind

2 · Build your own statement

Four choices, one sentence you can actually say. It should sound like you — edit it after it appears until it does.

What do you want? To slow down To stop To leave To not do this one Why (in one honest phrase) What do you need instead? How do you want it to land? Kindly and firmly Lightly, with humour Plainly, no softening

Build our statement

3 · The rules that make the words work

• Either partner can use any of these scripts at any time — no discussion required first.
• A pause or stop is never a debate opener. It's a full stop; the talking happens later, calmly, at home.
• If you practise one script together this week, make it the stop word. Knowing it works changes everything else.
• Kindness is not weakness here: a clear, warm no is easier to hear than a resentful yes.